My best friend is in town. She lives in Los Angeles and has been trying to break into acting for almost 4 years. In my opinion she has been successful, as she made it further than I ever would have. She has a vast book of modeling pictures and has been featured in print ads for Payless Shoes, the Gap, Forever 21, JC Penneys and Target. She has also filmed commercials for Playstation 3, Disarrono, Payless and Target. I'm proud of my friend and I love her very much.
But I must say, I wish she would leave that horrible city and come home.
I hate the city. In fact, I have trouble in our own little bitty Indianapolis during rush hour. I have anger problems - if we had any more traffic I would probably go on a muderous rampage.
I don't know how Sarah lives in such a big city. How do you find peace? And if you're alone, how do you find friends? And we discussed yesterday how impossible it is to find husband-material in such a place that exalts in bad behavior and ulterior motives and stepping on others to achieve their own measure of fame. Everyone wears two faces in Hollywood - even Sarah. She told me she has to pretend to be younger than she is, and dumber than she is, because if the companies she works for ever found out that she wasn't, they would drop her. Models have short careers. No one would hire a perfectly gorgeous, but (gasp) 28 year old woman because she only has 2 maybe 3 good years left in her. That sickens me. I plan to be just as beautiful or better than I am now in 2 years. Who made 30 the magic age when all your beauty diminishes and you become a useless sack of skin?
We visited our old elementary school and saw some of our old teachers, who still, after 13 years, remember how we used to pretend we were twins. In fact, we STILL pretend to be twins. Just, one of the half of us got to be 6 feet tall and the other one....didn't. It was surprisingly enjoyable. So much had changed. And so much was the same.
We discussed the future. I of course, will stay here and continue to tell people about Aflac, and Sarah will go back to work in LA, at least until the end of the year. I will try to pay off my debts, and she hopes to move to New York City and do some stage acting with a classmate of ours who is currently in an off-Broadway production after graduating from Julliard School of Music. I will continue to work and love my husband and build my home, and she will eventually wind her way back to us here in the Midwest and hopefully settle down at some point. Such different plans we have chosen for ourselves! But beautiful in our own ways. Mine seems dull compared to hers, but I have always erred of the side of caution. When she takes risks, she throws herself in 100%. But I'm much more careful. I don't like to take risks, I like to have stability. When we are old ladies, chasing the little old men in our wheelchairs in the nursing home together, I think we will both look back on our lives and be happy with how we sculpted them.
We discussed how we will eventually finish those books we started and restarted and reshaped over and over again. We've always written fantasy tales. We love fantasy and sci-fi and ghost tales. We discussed writing and then turning our tales into independent films. So much fun to imagine! I told her we would start a revolution! Imagine - NEW MATERIAL to watch on the TV? What a concept! It's so beautiful to imagine the future. I hope I never lose my child-like imagination.
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